Album release & a Reflection Part 1

I decided that since I have not released a blog post on this blog in a life time (so to speak) today is cause for some celebration! The best full album I’ve heard in 2017, Never Go Unknown, is out today digitally as per this announcement on Adam Wendler’s Facebook page (full album credits and the beautiful album cover art is also there) I say that as my own personal opinion, realizing I’ve got the bias of having the singer-songwriter as a younger brother (but biases aside, Juno-award winning producer Siegfried Meier did decide to tackle this album with Adam.) I know that there have been many times where I have heard a song long before it is polished and unleashed to the masses.

Such was the case back in January when I had my second or third (both 2nd and 3rd happened within days of each other) bout in the hospital with infections including pneumonia. I felt absolutely horrible at the time! I did not have much of a desire for anything. And while the hospital seemed the best option that day, my lack of desire for anything included the desire to make the call about actually going to the hospital. Don’t get me wrong, I wanted to get out of this position of suffering where I found myself. But to be the one to make the decision about actually going to hospital seemed silly to me when there was a plan in place to go at a specific time that I felt I agreed to, after a plan for an earlier time was not advised due to the busy nature of hospital emergency at the time. I think it was a situation where (a) there was a feeling that there was no real reason for anything, no sense of hope or a personal purpose of existence, and (b) when health is down, patience can decrease (patients aren’t necessarily patient ;)).

After over a year of being on different antibiotics, both oral and IV and some multiple times, it got to a point where from a medical perspective some were suggesting the possibility of amputating my lower left leg. In my mind, that would involve rehabilitation which would result in me having to figure out how to do things all over again while also being responsible for telling everyone helping me what to do (and keep in mind this guy who’s thoughts you’re reading is an introvert.) So you know for a guy who had done many seemingly insignificant things, maybe euthanasia would be a better idea? That was logical in my mind. But life’s not all about logic. I’m sure some readers would agree it would be best if the mind would just quiet down at times!

But anyway, it was that evening, sitting in the emergency room with my mother (and being in contact with my brother (via technology, which is significant because he’s not the most keen to sit there and text or chat when he could be playing his guitar instead. But who can blame him, listen to the album (links toward end of the post) to find x in the following equation: talent + drive & determination + the right connections = x ) For whatever reason, “Until You Came Around” was going through my head in the way that songs do, one part of it on repeat. The lines “It takes an honest man to go, but a better man to stay” were just jumping out at me. So powerful, yet so simple. Sometimes it just feels like there’s no hope, the blinders are on and darkness is what is visible. Love can be present but not observed or felt in that place. It depends how deep you are there and what your beliefs and convictions are just how much you can go in the spiral. But if you can tough it out, who knows what good will come when you see the love and support that was always there. I recently read a couple of good blog posts written by someone I know from my days attending summer camps that are related to allowing love from others and loving people well which I found particularly insightful. So feel free to check them out here and here.

The following quote I’ve heard many times (being a Michael Jackson fan), but it finally seems to have more meaning to me, given the above story:

“I am an instrument of nature. Love is my message.” – Michael Jackson

I feel as though “nature’s” voice was coming through to me in the song.

Amazing album that has the potential to reach so many people, and give so many more the opportunity to simply get their groove on.

You can listen to the album at these links for now (other online platforms to come):
https://www.adamwendlermusic.com/
https://soundcloud.com/adam-wendler/sets/never-go-unknown
https://adamwendler.bandcamp.com/

More posts to come!

A job? Seriously?

You’ve probably seen this video floating around on the internet lately, as social media tends to make these things spread.

I’m not going to get into the mobility category of this job if it were me looking at the requirements. It just simply wouldn’t fly with me if I read it in the job listings, I tend not to stand very often. Personal preference. 😉

The point is, it’s really quite a selfless job where others are put first. The self comes after, if at all.  I’m not a mother, and I’m pretty sure I never will be in this life time, but it seems to me that there are at least a few, if not many, who flat out decide they WANT to have this position in their lives. I suppose that’s not saying they want to deal with everything involved in being a mother. I can’t see my own mother saying “Ok so, lets have a child with Spina Bifida! I want a child who can’t walk and who needs to go see all these professionals in London at least once or twice per year and deal with a plethora of oddities in the human condition created by Spina Bifida.” And not simply because I don’t think of her using the words “plethora of oddities” which came to my mind out of the blue to succinctly describe conditions created by my… condition. The hours upon hours spent in waiting rooms at the Children’s clinic, and many more hours spent in hospital x ray department waiting rooms can’t have been that hopping of a party. I mean, there were a lot of people as I recall but the booze wasn’t flowing and the Fermented Oranges weren’t even a thought back in those days as far as I am aware. New Kids on the Block might have been around and perhaps popular, but not in those waiting rooms. Tangent end: But that wasn’t my point.

There are plenty of unpleasant things involved with being a mother which the video above outlines quite well. You’re dealing with young people through sickness and health, through coping with varying relationships, friendships, struggles and triumphs, and perhaps other dilemmas, conundrums and interesting situations. You’re dealing with seeing your children’s triumphs and misfortunes on the journey toward reaching and perhaps surpassing their dreams using these very triumphs and misfortunes to their advantage. In fact, as the video shows we expect something for ourselves when we think of jobs or employment.  We have this idea that we are entitled to things when we are employed.  It seems that our ego awakens and tells us we deserve breaks, we deserve time off, we deserve this or that.  Funny how all that changes when we look at the title of the job in this video!  People take so much for granted sometimes. I guess mostly it is if you take it for granted that any people or things around you are yours to use as you please without any thought or consideration for how it would affect anything but yourself.

If you’re dealing with too much in self discovery and self-improvement it can be too much to even consider having or raising a child. If you’re too self-focused it might be challenging to have one or more young ones around you who are innocent and open to so many different influences in the world and need strong and positive guidance to ensure they start off on the right path to greatness. I can only be thankful that my own mother never seemed to run into that. She was always there, like the job description in the video requests. She was, and still is always there to the best of her ability. Not only that, but with my dad’s regular traveling, even from a distance I can receive their love and support… and some home cooked food or other goodies from time to time. Things may change, but they stay the same too.